Thoughts. Aaron Harvey suffers from Pure OCD, an obsessive compulsive disorder that makes the sufferer think unwanted thoughts having to do with sex or violence, and usually having very little control over them.
Disorder. According to Cosmopolitan, Pure OCD has only recently been acknowledged as a disorder, with the first news of it coming out in 1989. Some experts would consider it part of the characteristics of someone who had generalized anxiety disorder.
Scenarios. When describing what kinds of things go on ins his mind, Harvey says most of his thoughts have to do with the worst possible scenarios that could happen which involve sex, violence, and religion.
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Intrusive. "Everyone has intrusive thoughts, but people with Pure OCD also have an anxiety disorder, so when they see uncomfortable images, they start to feel upset, question their character, or question their capabilities,” says Harvey, as reported by Cosmopolitan.
Obsessed. According to Psychology Today, people with Pure OCD have obsessive violent thoughts that make them live in fear that they will act upon these violent thoughts, causing them to live in fear of what they could possibly do for most of their lives.
Harm. "One of the things I have to deal with the most is harm OCD, and it's really challenging. When I step into the shower and see the razor blade, it will automatically trigger [an image of] me, like, mutilating my genitalia,” says Harvey, as reported by Cosmopolitan.
Sex. When it comes to having sexual thoughts, Harvey says he can’t seem to get them out of his head. He says he recalls having his first sexual thought early on in his childhood, which was a hard thing for him to deal with as he was being raised in a Christian household.
Sanity. These kinds of thoughts cause people to have internal battles with themselves, because they get angry at themselves for being capable of having thoughts like that. They start to question their own sanity.
Triggers. For Harvey, there are certain triggers that cause his intrusive thoughts. "For me, anything violent, anything sexual ... it's really random. My no. 1 trigger is a knife. I'm going through exposure response prevention now where one of my first steps is just leaving a butcher knife on my butcher block or cutting board,” says Harvey, as reported by Cosmopolitan.
Relationship. Harvey explains that his Pure OCD has also affected a lot of his relationships. His sex life is affected because he can’t help but picture horrendous things happening as he is having sex. His thoughts were so intense that it cost him his marriage.
Website. Harvey has founded IntrusiveThoughts.org, a website for people to seek treatment, read about the symptoms, and be generally informed about what Pure OCD is.
Sexuality. Rose Bretecher also suffers from Pure OCD. She began having her first thoughts in her early teens, and has been struggling with Pure OCD ever since. Bretecher was so plagued by her thoughts that it caused her to question her sexual identity. She would picture her friends’ breasts while playing board games, picture images of vaginas in every day things, and couldn’t help but pay close attention to breast feeding mothers.
Thoughts. "I'd describe my gay thoughts to my friends and use their reactions to gauge the plausibility of my homosexuality. I'd browse profiles on lesbian dating sites, trying to imagine myself kissing each stranger's face,” writes Bretecher, via the Guardian.
Understanding. Her thoughts became so hard to deal with that she eventually dropped out of school, and even contemplate suicide. Finally, after randomly searching the Internet, she found an article on Pure OCD that changed her life.
Therapy. After receiving therapy, Bretecher discovered she wasn’t the only person dealing with this condition. "In the past four months since I finished therapy, there have been moments when the pure O has lifted, imperceptibly, like rising light, and I've had no thoughts in my mind; felt nothing but the quiet joy of concentration or the shimmer of my boyfriend's touch,” writes Bretecher, as reported by the Guardian.
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