Hotel offers lessons in love

One in three French people claim to have had a workplace romance, most often a short-lived fling, according to a survey

A hotel in Sweden is offering amorous guests the chance to book in for some lessons in love.

The landlady of the Venusgarden guesthouse (www.venusgarden.se) in Skurup, near Malmo in the country’s south, boasts a rather unusual sideline – that of professional orgasm coach.

Ylva Franzén is the author of a best-selling book Orgasmera Mera (Orgasming More) and runs Sweden’s first “love hotel” with her husband.

The farmhouse has three themed bedrooms – “Kamasutra”, “Venus” and “Tao” – and each are stocked with feathers, massage oils, perfumed candles, erotic illustrations and a basket of love toys, along with a copy of Franzén’s book.

The Kamasutra room has been styled as a “lavish Indian love temple” and the Tao room features a swing above the bed and a mirror on the ceiling.

Franzén, a 67-year-old former teacher who gives her guests advice on aphrodisiacs, told the Australian website www.news.com.au: ‘We’ve had honeymooners, couples celebrating anniversaries and young unmarried couples.

‘But most of our guests tend to be middle-aged people who already have fantastic relationships and know each other very well and remember the wonderful days of passion and intimacy. And want to revive them.” – Daily Mail

Men fake it in the bedroom too

In the film When Harry Met Sally, Meg Ryan famously showed how easy it is for a woman to fake an orgasm.

London - In the film When Harry Met Sally, Meg Ryan famously showed how easy it is for a woman.

But it would seem that faking an orgasm is a skill which is not exclusive to females, as two surveys have shown that nearly a third of men admit doing it too.

Some 31 percent of men polled by Time Out magazine confessed to pretending – backing up a recent study from the University of Kansas which found that 28 percent had done the same.

Time Out stopped 100 people randomly on the street in New York to ask about their sex lives, while the university study saw psychologists quiz 180 men in their early 20s.

Experts say that pressure to perform and fear of failure can leave men with no option but to fake it. Others simply don’t want to hurt their partner’s feelings.

Dr Pam Spurr, a relationship expert and self-help author, said the pressure felt by men is also partly down to society’s “high-octane” portrayal of sex.

She added: “It goes to the heart of their self-definition of manliness if they feel they can’t live up to this. Some feel the need to prove themselves.”

Other experts say that men are forced to pretend because it is less acceptable for them to simply say that they are not in the mood.

However, it seems women are still more likely to resort to pretence.

While the University of Kansas study found that 28 percent of men had faked an orgasm, women were still in the majority as 68 percent of females said they had too. - Daily Mail

Ten things that only happen in the movies

The GLAMOUR list:

By Kimberly Bonnell and Pamela Redmond Satran

1. Passionately kissing someone who, until just a second ago, you thought you despised.

2. Losing all 14kg of pregnancy weight in the time it takes to OW-OW-OW-AWWW! birth the baby.

3. People leaping up to stop the wedding.

4. Thirty seconds of passionate sex and then bam! - she has an orgasm.

5. Wearing a bra while having sex.

6. Working as an unpaid intern at a fashion magazine and getting an entire couture wardrobe totally free.

7. Discovering that your cat can talk, your boyfriend can fly or there's an alien living in your toolshed.

8. Inspired, poetic, spontaneous 'I love you' speeches.

9. Day after day of perfect skin and buttery highlights.

10. Tom Cruise, always looking tall.

DVD Review - Shortbus

Film: Shortbus caused major controversy when it first appeared on screens for its graphic sex scenes. Critics went crazy over the question of whether the explicit carnality constitutes art or pornography. That is, to put it bluntly, besides the point.

Shortbus is a sweet, almost sentimental look at the intersecting lives of confused twenty-something urban dwellers. Sex is used as a metaphor for their foibles.

Sofia (Sook-Yin Lee) is a sex therapist who's never had an orgasm. Troubled James (Paul Dawson) and devoted boyfriend Jamie's (PJ DeBoy) relationship takes strain when Jamie suggests opening their relationship. Severin (Lindsay Beamish) is a socially retarded dominatrix who struggles to maintain a single human relationship. They all come together at Shortbus, a sort of club where politics, music, art and sex collide.

The film is very funny with quite a few laugh out loud moments.

Once you get over the sex, you'll find yourself actually caring for the characters.

As for the question of whether the sex is necessary or gratuitous, I have neither the inclination nor the word count to address that.

Special Features: Commentary, deleted scenes, trailers.

Why women love oral sex

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10 secrets women wish you knew

If you take time to talk to and bond with your wife, she will feel emotionally closer to you

Do you find women hard to read, especially in bed? If so, here's a list of 10 sex and relationship secrets that women wish men knew about them… and if they did, it could make sex a whole lot better.

1. She wants to be French kissed

Long, deep and sexy French kisses are highly intimate - and highly arousing. If you want to turn a woman on for sex, kiss her deeply and keep returning for more kisses during sex. Sex without kissing is like repairing a bicycle - her wheels might turn but they won't be well oiled.

2. She gets bored easily with routine sex

If you do the same things over and over, she'll eventually lose interest in sex with you even though she loves you. This is because when women are bored, it's harder for them to get aroused, and sex without arousal is uncomfortable at best and painful at worst. If you make an effort to keep sex fresh and exciting, you'll arouse her and she'll keep wanting you.

3 Emotional closeness = sexual intimacy

That saying, “If you want a happy home, keep your wife happy” is true in the bedroom too. If you take time to talk to and bond with your wife, she will feel emotionally closer to you. For women, emotional closeness leads to wanting sexual intimacy. The key is warm, genuine conversation in which you trust and open up to each other.

4. She wants to have orgasms

Women don't have to have one every time they have sex, but most would like one more often than not. What many men don't realise is that only 30% of women reach an orgasm through penetration. It's friction on the clitoris with a tongue, fingers, vibrator or all three, usually for 10-20 minutes, that takes her to nirvana.

5. Anger and resentment kill her libido

If you want a good sex life, sort out any issues between you before you retire to bed - and work on them until resolved and she's happy again. If you leave problems unresolved because your ego demands that you 'win' the point and she 'loses', she'll be as receptive in bed as a spitting cobra.

6. She worries her genitals are off-putting

Many women worry about their man putting his face close to their genitals - especially for oral sex. She'd love you to pleasure her with your tongue but she's as nervous as hell you'll dislike her smell and taste. Wax lyrical about how much you love her intimate parts and you'll will boost her sexual self-esteem no end. And score big brownie points.

7. She wants her imperfections accepted

If she has cellulite and wobbly bits, point out your boep and skinny legs and laugh together at your imperfections. Tell her which parts of her naked body you adore, and why. The more accepted and desirable she feels, the more likely she is to lose her inhibitions in bed and seek to please you.

8. She needs to feel valued

Women tend to be the givers in a relationship. In return, they need to know they are valued and appreciated. The saying goes that women give sex to get love, and men give love to get sex. If you show her you love, appreciate and value her, she's likely to keep wanting sexual intimacy with you.

9. She needs a light touch

Women like to be touched more gently than most men actually touch them. This is because a woman's skin is thinner and more sensitive than a man's. Women's skin is more sensitive to pain because it contains about twice the amount of nerve fibres that men's skin has. So when you touch her, try using half as much pressure as you think you should.

10. She loves more than one orgasm

Usually, the more orgasms a woman has in one sex session, the greater their intensity. The first orgasm may register two or three on the Richter scale but by the time she hits orgasm number three and four, the contractions feel closer to nine. And ejaculation, an intensely pleasurable sensation, is more likely to occur. Give her a few minutes' break after orgasm number one and then stimulate her afresh.

Itchy 'zombie' Zac Efron

Zac Efron thinks he looks like "a zombie" after catching poison oak.

The High School Musical star developed the skin condition - which is dermatitis caused by the sap of poison ivy - after going cliff jumping with friends and he has now started to resemble one of the undead.

He explained: "I went backpacking over Memorial Day weekend (at the end of May) and I just got the worst poison oak. It was my first time getting it. Dude, it's like everywhere - everywhere! I can't even begin to show you, because you'll get so grossed out. I look like a zombie from Dawn Of The Dead."

Zac tried to dodge the poisonous plant but felt it brush his back as he jumped off the cliff and immediately knew he had contracted the condition, which has left the hunk with itchy, inflamed and blistered skin.

The 22-year-old actor - who is dating Vanessa Hudgens - has had to "air out" awkward parts of his body, but admits any opportunity he gets to wash and soothe the pain feels like "the best orgasm ever".

Speaking about his treatment, Zac added in an interview with Details magazine: "Oh my God, it's like the best orgasm ever! I'm just airing it out. It just itches too much."

Battle of the sexes reaches climax

The famous orgasm-faking scene from When Harry Met Sally - but you don't have to fake it at all...

It's true that women find it far harder than men to reach an orgasm. They aren't as easily aroused, they take far longer to climax and they find it more difficult to get there. Yet the female orgasm is purely about pleasure - whereas a guy's orgasm is the primal task of getting his sperm to the egg. Do women get a raw deal in the stake for orgasms or are they actually better off?

When it comes to sex, you can't blame women for feeling like they're running a marathon while men have a gentle stroll in the park. For instance, most guys take two minutes from the start of sexual relation to ejaculation. That's right - just two minutes to complete the job (according to Dr Alfred Kinsey in his ground-breaking human sexual behaviour report of 1948). The job being the release of sperm for procreation purposes, of course.

Once he's dispatched the good little swimmers, his swimmer dispatching tool needs to rest (it's called the refractory period) for anything from 20 minutes to two days before it's operationally ready again. So not only do guys get aroused at the drop of a hat - or skirt, or from the endless annual parade of swimsuit editions - but within two minutes it's all over. To crown it all, he then needs rest before he can go again. Most likely scenario? He falls asleep, thanks to sex depleting his glycogen stores.

Herein lies the problem: most women take 20-40 minutes to reach a climax. And for 70 percent of women, this means direct, ongoing stimulation of the clitoris - only about 30 percent of women can orgasm through penetrative intercourse. This is because stimulation of the clitoris is the trigger of orgasms in women - yet it is located outside of the vagina, which means it barely gets a nod of recognition in traditional intercourse. So how does her need for 20-40 minutes correlate with his speedy two-minute process? Women aren't even given a fighting chance.

It is abundantly clear that nature's not concerned with whether or not women have orgasms. No female enjoyment is needed to get women pregnant and continue the species. If nature was concerned, the clitoris would be located two inches inside the vagina, women would slide off their chairs at the sight of a naked guy, and men would take 30-40 minutes of ongoing thrusting to be able to ejaculate.

But nature, I concede, compensates women spectacularly for this lack of oversight. When a guy has sex, he usually - but not always - achieves an orgasm. Less than a third of women climax from penetration, in part because it's all over too quickly. Yet when a woman does orgasm it can last for up to a minute, compared to the average male orgasm of a couple of seconds.

As fair compensation, women's orgasms last far longer and are far more intense than men's. And taking it one step further, women are capable of multiple orgasms (one orgasm after another without the loss of arousal) and sequential orgasms (a number of orgasms within the same sex session).

Admittedly, this requires something beyond mere intercourse - a skilful finger or tongue usually does the trick, but this may take a good while. A vibrator applied to the clitoris usually brings on orgasms far quicker than manual stimulation as the powerful vibration is intensely exciting.

As women become more skilful at masturbation (especially with the wide range of battery-operated toys now at their disposal), and their lovers improve their oral and manual technique on that hub of orgasmic contractions, the clitoris, women are likely to become more focused on achieving orgasms for orgasm's sake. And given that in contrast women's orgasms are that much more intense, for longer, who can blame them?

To find her G-spot, his P-spot and how to stimulate the clit for orgasms to die for, see the sex techniques and vibrators available at OhZone. - IOL

Britney brushes up on oral sex

Britney Spears is said to give perfect oral sex - after getting expert

tips from Sex And The City star Kim Cattrall. The Toxic singer, who is eight months pregnant with her first child, is said to have finessed the art of fellatio after purchasing sex manual Satisfaction: The Art of the Female Orgasm - written by Kim.

The book contains numerous graphic diagrams complete with instructions on how to perform a variety of sex acts and different positions for sexual intercourse.

Spears, who is married to dancer Kevin Federline, is said to have purchased the manual while dating pop heartthrob Justin Timberlake.

The claim has been made by the makers of a new documentary about the 23-year-old star, Britney's redneck Roots due to be screened on British television.

However, the allegation has been cut from the final version of the programme so as not to offend Britney. A show insider said: "Although we are sure this is a piece of juicy gossip which would go down well with her fans, the producers decided to it would be

best to keep off the sex angle."